The Colbert Report/Episode/542
Production Info |- |} |- |} Intro SEGMENT1 * Dr. Colbert has a pounder (headache) ** he's sorry, bear with him *** Still recovering from a hard night from tea bagging * with Michael Steele & Joe The Plumber ** funny taste in his mouth * not just his head * he googled tea bag ** found another definition * sexual insult doesn't begin to describe it * not what he was doing * takes courage ** and cojones * sullied the name of Julio Dirty Sanchez SEGMENT2 * other cultures are pretty fucked up * in India * In Patagonia * in some U.S. states two dudes can get married * cannot be solved by clearing our your web browser * National Organization for Marriage ** released an ad on The YouTube * Dr. Colbert loves that ad ** like watching the 700 Club and the Weather Channel at the same time * this storm is coming * Massachusetts legalized marriage ** Gaysrael * Iowa voted to strike down gay marriage ban ** nothing else to do in Iowa ** shuck corn ** drag race ** pound a sixer ** shuck more corn ** propose to your football coach * David Paterson wants to legalize gay marriage in New York ** cannot get a marriage announcement in the New York Times ** sneak it into a police interview * stormfront moving into the homefront ** Dr. Colbert made his own ad * Colbert Coalition (National Organization for Colbert) ** a rainbow of people coming together in a commercial ** won't make you retroactively gay * paid for a church that may or may not be the Mormons * when gays get rights, ours get taken away Democracy In India * wants to recommend Slumdog Millionaire ** trivia ** police brutaility * $64,000 Tasing * voting began in India's parliamentary election ** 400 million people ** voting lasts a month * Shashi Tharoor running for parliament * Shashi's son, Kanishk Tharoor ** tube: Open Democracy * welcome to break out in dance * between flag pins and gay marriage * poverty and economy ** 2/3 of voters are from rural areas * in 2004, BJP was voted out ** and they don't vote against their interests * give Shashi The Bump ** put a chicken in every pot, but not likely a chicken in every tandoor(sp) because he's a vegetarian ** vegetable corma(sp) Interview * Doug Kmiec ** book: "Can a Catholic Support Him? Asking the Big Questions about Barack Obama" * thinks government shouldn't be in the marriage business, Stephen agrees; they do terrible floral arrangements * 2 things # Can a Catholic Support him? short book, answer is no (Kmeic claims "yes we can") # he can solve the gay marriage storm state doesn't do everything well (don't get baptised) * marriage is making the babies ** Stephen thought he was a Catholic * the Kmiec family cannot compete * what will people do if the state pulls out? ** won't have children that way * church decides who gets married, state * gays can get a license (straights too) from the state * no atheists can get married ** go to a church or start their own atheist church * he's playing a semantic game ** three people could make a contract * if gay marriage is allowed ... * Stephen only got married as a taunt ** wrote his own vows: na-na-na-na-na-na * state should not adopt any one religion ** but, if they had to (Catholic) *** hypothetically in a world where monkeys eat meat Epilogue * Dr Colbert salutes The Heroes a firm good night everybody! Gallery Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Official Truthy Videos * Colbert Nation Home Tube External Tubes *Link Title *Link Title Reviews and Comments